April 10, 2008 April 11, 2008

About a week ago I heard G’Pa call me at about 6:30 am (he says “yo, Yo, Yo!”) and when I got to his room he was sitting up on the side of the bed like he was ready to go somewhere.  He was all smiles like he had pulled a joke!  Fortunately nothing was wrong and he was just ready to start his day!  Later I asked him to call me after 7 am–I am not a morning person.

I have been working on our taxes–thus the long lapse in my postings.  I discovered that we can claim G’Pa as a dependent.  He actually asked me about it a few days ago.  I told him, “Oh yes, you can be claimed and you will be.  I called the IRS.”  He thought that was cool.

I went to see the divorce lawyer.  He thought it would be fairly simple unless Flo’s family decides to contest it.  They would have to come to Oregon and we would go to court.  In the meantime, he contacted Jim Taylor to find out who Flo’s conservator is so that person could be served with the divorce papers.  When he talked to Jim, Jim said that he thought that Flo (really meaning him) should get $50,000. for her portion of the condo.  My response, and G’Pas when I told him, was NO WAY.  She signed a quick claim deed to him and the condo is totally in his name.  They would have no grounds since  Flo left him in 2000 and there has been no contact since.  I thought I would hear from the lawyer this week, but so far I haven’t heard anything.  

I took G’Pa to the doctor today.  It was a totally different experience than with the previous doctor.  This guy asked questions, made suggestions, checked the heart, lungs, respiration, etc.  G’Pa had difficulty understanding him but I thought he was thorough.  Later G’Pa said that I shouldn’t tell the doctor anything!    I guess that is how he has survived all of this time.  If you never admit to any problems, maybe they will go away!

That is all for now.  Love to all!

Doctor March 29, 2008

I forgot to mention in the prior post that we have an appointment with a different doctor on April 10th.  Arden doesn’t have anything specific to see him about but we need to have one for the record. My next project is getting Arden and Flo divorced.  I have an appointment with a lawyer on Monday.  Arden has qualified for the VA pension for aid and assistance which is available to WWII vets.  However, they want information on Flo and he might be disqualified if they find her and she has income.  So, I have been advised to get them divorced.  Of course, the _______ may hit the fan with her family because she now gets Arden’s military benefits including medical insurance.  More on that later. Oh yes, I forgot to mention that today is March 29th and it is SNOWING at our house!  Is that Global Warming? 

“It is Always Something” March 29, 2008

We realized when we took G’Pa to The Reserve for Easter Brunch that we needed a handicap placard for the car.  The next day I called his doctor’s office.  His doctor, Dr. Barich, has left the practice and moved to Salem to work out of Salem Hospital.  So, I asked the receptionist if the other doctor could sign the form for the DMV so we could get the placard,  She said no because Dr. Apau is not taking any more medicare patients.  I explained that Dr. Barich told us that his patients could continue in the same office with Dr. Apau.  Again—NO.  So what to do!!!!!  I called the dermatologist and she agreed to sign the form.  The people in her office are great.  They printed the form off the internet, had the doctor sign it, and then put it in the mail for me. I gathered everything together, Arden’s military ID, the forms from Dr. Klein’s office,  my Power of Attorney, and a book to read (sometimes the wait at the DMV can be an hour.)  I didn’t have to wait and was able to just walk up to the counter.  I explained what I needed and gave the lady the appropriate forms and info.  She got her supervisor and they explained to me that we would have to bring Arden in to have his picture taken and get an Oregon ID since he doesn’t have an Oregon driver’s license.  They e further explained that if it is impossible to bring him in then the doctor needs to check a different box (#2 not #4) and then I could bring it back in!  So, the next day I went back to Dr. Klein’s office and had them mark the other box….back to the DMV.  This time I did have to wait, but at the counter while the lady was talking to her supervisor (this time I went to Sherwood DMV, not Hillsboro DMV).  I actually ready about 20 pages while I was waiting.  She finally came back and explained that the form was not acceptable because BOTH #2 and #4 were checked!!!!!!!  I will have to get the doctor to sign a new form and then I will send everything in to the DMV in Salem along with $29.00 for the privilege.  I called Dr. Klein’s office again and they will get the doctor to sign again–and check only #2, and send it to me.  Evan said, “why don’t you just skip it,”  but I am too far into it now……and too stubborn! 

Happy Easter! March 26, 2008

Last week we took G’Pa to the dermatologist.  He has a lot of skin issues, but two wart-like bumps on his hand were bothering him as well as a lump behind his ear.    Getting him there was a hassle because we couldn’t get a ride through the free Ride Connection.  So Evan came home and we got G’Pa in Ev’s car–not easily done since G’Pa has lost a lot of the strength he built up when the physical therapist was working with him.  Now he doesn’t want to exercise and has trouble bearing weight on his legs.  Getting him out of the car is easy–getting him in is a challenge.  The dermatologist removed the various problems and later called to say that they were cancerous, but a slow growing skin cancer.  After getting him home, he slept most of the day and slept a lot the following day–it takes two days to recover from outings! Easter Sunday we took G’Pa to The Reserve Golf Course for brunch.  Scott, Perry and Evan’s brother John met us there.  G’Pa loved it.  It is a lovely place–quite elegant.  He wanted a drink, so Evan went and ordered it for him–I found out later that it was a “virgin” gin and tonic–but G’Pa remarked that they make the drinks strong!!!!   They had plates of fresh crab so I cracked the crab and put it on his plate–I couldn’t keep up with him!   He is still talking about the brunch.Basically things are good.  He has been pleasant and cooperative.  He hasn’t mentioned “going to plan B”  in several weeks.  He is finally getting his military pay–it has taken them six months to figure it out!  And, he is now getting the VA pension we applied for in September.  We are able to pay all of his bills and pay for the caregivers who still come every day except for Saturday.  He knows that his condo has been rented so he doesn’t have to worry about it.  (We worry– because we don’t know what is going to break next.  We have replaced the refrigerator, disposal, and dishwasher.  There is still some electrical works that needs to be done.) Sue

Thursday, March 20, 2008 March 20, 2008

It has been a while since I have written in this blog.  We have had good days and bad days.  We have had a couple of days when all G’Pa did is sleep–a little scary.  He didn’t want to eat or anything.  However, in each case by the following day he was awake and alert again.  I told my friends about these episodes and about my fear  and dread of going in to his room and find that he has passed away.  They encouraged me to make a plan, which I am doing.  Today I am going to meet with a mortician and filling out paperwork.  Then when I need to I will just make one phone call.  He will do all the rest.  He told me to note the time, call him and then take all the time I needed.  The sheriff and medical examiner will come out and handle it from there.  At least now I know what to do and how the process works.  I know this sounds morbid and fatalistic but I like to think of it as pro-active and being prepared for the inevitable.G’P a has complained about a couple of warts on his right hand and a lump on the back of his right ear.  He asked me to make an appointment for him to see a dermatologist–today was the day.  She looked at all of his skin conditions and said she could remove the warts and the lump.  She suggested that she refer him to a specialist about the basal cell carcenoma (skin cancer) on his nose but he said no he didn’t want part of his nose removed.  She agreed and said it would take many years for the cancer to spread.  She removed the warts and the lump and we were done!  We just need to change the dressing and put polysporin on it daily.  She said both areas will take a long time to heal.Evan took me to California for my birthday–the caregivers stayed with G’Pa.  Between Julie, Kevin and Evan, they planned a wonderful relaxing weekend.  We stayed in Santa Monica and were able to walk on the beach from the hotel.  The weather was warm and balmy–what a relief.    More later.  Sue  

Tuesday, February 26, 2008 February 26, 2008

Sunday was an amazing day.  G’Pa has been talking about seeing Pumpkin Ridge Golf Course for a long time.  Since the physical therapist worked with us last week to show G’Pa and us how to get him in and out of the car, we decided to take him to Pumpkin Ridge on Sunday.  With help he was able to get into the car.  When we got to the golf course, he was amazed.  He thought it was going to be some little shack with a little nine hole course.  Of course, it is not like that.  There are actually two 18-hold course, one for members and one for the public.  The Club House for the public is lovely and we had considered it for Julie and Kevin’s wedding.  We took him around to the 1st and 19th tees as well as watching people practice ion the driving range.  Inside we went into the pro shop so G’Pa could pick out a Pumpkin Ridge cap.  Then he wanted to go get something to drink–we hesitated and then Evan said, “Oh well, it can’t hurt!”  So G’Pa ordered a vodka tonic.  He probably drank half of it and kept saying how strong it was.  He was very content to just sit and watch the golfers and visit.  We probably sat there an hour before heading home.  When we got home, he kept thanking us.  It was all worth it!

Sunday, February 17, 2008 February 17, 2008

I can’t believe I have written in this work two weeks!  I have actually been working.  I substitute for an elementary school counselor in Hillsboro who is on the OEA board and she has to go to a lot of meetings so the OEA pays for her to have a substitute.  It has been fun and definitely allows me to do something I really enjoy.  This school has 3-4 classes per grade level and is multi-cultural.  There are quite a few middle-eastern kids which is new for me.  I get to run little groups with kids who need to learn to get a long with others, I go into classrooms and teach lessons on bullying, respect, problem solving, and personal safety.  I love going into the primary grades.  They all know me as Mrs. “J”.  I worked three days last week and two this week.  I work next Friday, and then I don’t work again until April.  Because G’Pa thinks everything is about him, he thinks I am working to help pay for his care!     Speaking about money, G’Pa has not received his military pay since September.  I have called, written letters, called again but still haven’t received it.  He is getting his military mail, like his military magazine and a card will all of the pertinent information including his new bank info.  I called again last Tueday and talked to a real person.  She check and finally discovered that his pay had been suspended because they tried to send it to his old bank and it was returned. She said she would clear it up and he should get his back pay by next Wednesday and it would be good from then on….we’ll see!       G’Pa is basically the same.  He still talks about going to Hawaii, but mainly to see what is going on.  He knows we have renters but he thinks he needs to check up on them.  Whenever he mentions going back, I either ignore him or change the subject.  He says, “You can’t keep putting me off!”  Oh, yes I can!  I have told him that it would cost us over $8,000/month to have 24 hour care and he can go back when he figures out how to get that kind of money!!!!     G’Pa always reports his dreams when he wakes up.  They are usually about something or someone from his childhood or early adulthood.  However, the other day he said, “I told John no!”  When I asked what he meant, he said that he dreamed that John McCain (his hero and his candidate) asked him to be his running mate.  G’Pa turned him down.  Darn!  Now none of us will get to visit him at the White House or in Washington DC!  He said that he turn John down because he doesn’t want to live in DC!       This weekend has been interesting.  Evan came home from North Carolina really sick!  He has been in bed all weekend and I have been Nurse Betty or Florence Nightengale!  He has been sick enough that he hasn’t even checked his emails or phone messages in two days!  We canceled the caregiver for today and will probably cancel for tomorrow because I think Evan should stay home another day.  He is feeling better today–but not even 75%.  I went to the store yesterday and loaded up on Vitamin C, Zicam, apple juice, orange juice, and soup.        I talked to Magalie yesterday.  She is feeling fine and everything is going as expected.  They are going back to the doctor on March 6th and will get another ultrasound–nice birthday present for Grandma Suzie! 

Monday, February 4, 2008 February 4, 2008

We woke up Saturday with about 6 inches of snow on the ground! What a suprprise! It was an OK day–but G’Pa pouts if he is left alone too long. Evan went into town to get groceries and go to the cleaners. He said the roads were fine once he got down to the bottom of our hill. We got G’Pa into the wheel chair and out to have dinner with us. We were having leftovers and waffles–he refused the waffles but ate plenty of other food. He seems to enjoys sitting and talking with us–but then has to go back to bed. We think it has more to do with body functions than with being tired of sitting in the chair. He had Evan stop by the office (Julie’s old room). He said he wanted to see it because when he comes back to visit us again he thinks he should stay in that room rather than using our room….Hmmmmm!
Sunday we left at 10 when Charlotte arrived. We told G’Pa that we were going to a Super Bowl party and he was invited but he declined. We did a little shopping then went to our friend’s house at about 2. We had a great time–even though the game was a little slow until the 4th quarter. My hero was Kevin Boss, who is from Philomath, just 10 miles west of Corvallis.
After the game we talked for a while, especially about G’Pa. Other people just don’t understand what we are dealing with–not that we want sympathy. Harley said we just need to use “tough love.” If he gets mean, just leave him in his soiled Depends until he can’t stand it–oh yea, that will work! Or if he refuses to eat, don’t bring him anymore until he asks for it! This might work for a 10 year old, but this man has been stubborn, self-centered and self absorbed, and mean when he doesn’t get his way all of his life. We certainly aren’t going to change him now! The easiest things I do is leave the room and do something enjoyable like playing with the dogs or knitting!
When we got home, G’Pa and Evan watched ESPN analyze the game. According to Charlotte, G’Pa watched the entire game but he reported that he only watched part of it. I think he said that because he can’t remember all that happened.
Today, G’Pa’s new flat screen LCD TV arrived. It won’t be upgraded to HD on Direct TV until Thursday so the picture is a little distorted. It is amazing how thin it is compared to the big tube TV.

Thursday, January 31, 2008 February 4, 2008

G’Pa was really in a funk today. He didn’t want anything to do with Terry, the physical therapist and was quite rude to him. Terry left after trying to cajole Arden into participating in physical therapy. The rest of the day was terrible– didn’t want to eat, be changed, drink his Ensure, watch TV, be nice, or anything else. I was quite relieved when Alivia showed up so I could leave! Fortunately Alivia was able to get him in a better mood. Evan got home before I did and as I entered the house I could hear them laughing. It turns out that Evan spilled juice all over the bed and G’Pa and G’Pa thought it was hilarious! I helped Evan get G’Pa into the wheel chair so I could change the bedding…G’Pa continued to laugh the rest of the evening.
I went bowling with my friends and then to dinner tonight. I actually bowled pretty good–102, 121. I am making progress from the 70’s and 80’s that I use to get!

Up date on lunch with Lynne Dagg February 4, 2008

I enjoyed my lunch with Lynne Dagg (Bob Burco’s ex-wife). She and her husband bought a condo at the base of the OHSU tram. The view is spectacular, but the unit is small. They seem to like it because they can take the street car up to PSU, downtown Portland, and most other places they want to go.
Lynne gave the a update on her kids: Douglas and his wife Greta live in Seattle, somewhere in NW. They have a little girl named Maggie. Lynne says this she is not named for Grandma Margaret (No one every called Grandma Margaret “Maggie” anyway.) She said the Greta always wanted to name her first girl Maggie. One of the twins–I think it is Julia is married, has two kids and lives in South Dakota. The other twin–Katie–live in Davis, Calif. and is not married. I don’t remember what Leslie is doing.
I enjoyed spending time with Lynne. She is an intelligent woman and very easy to talk to. She shares some of my ideas about the Burco side of the family, but we don’t dwell on that topic!